A Beginner’s Guide to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt3

A Beginner’s Guide
to Wearing
a Chastity Device Pt3
Or everything you ever wanted to know about male chastity cages

Keyholder Solutions and Safety
The keyholder (whether a partner or yourself) plays a critical role in chastity. Safety is paramount, especially for emergency access.

1. Traditional Padlocks & Keys
♦   Keep a spare key in a secure but accessible location, like a locked box with a code only you or your partner know.
♦   For solo users, consider sealing the key in an envelope with a signature to prevent impulsive unlocking.
♦   The number one problem I have experienced with key padlocks is the keys breaking in the lock! Always use a quality padlock and key, if the key or keyhole is becoming degraded (they do get wet a lot or lathered in sad pre-cum tears) replace them immediately.
♦   The advantage of using a traditional metal padlock is that it provides a strong psychological sense of security, as the tangible, physical act of locking and unlocking feels definitive and can become a ritualistic act. The weight and feel of metal padlocks contribute to this perception, making them a trusted choice for securing belongings. Additionally, padlocks can serve as ownership markers when engraved with ‘Property of’ followed by a name or initials.

2. Numbered Plastic Lock Tags
Plastic lock tags are cuttable plastic numbered tags that can be used instead of locks, they are lighter than traditional padlocks and can be quickly removed in urgent or emergency situations. They are numbered so your keyholder will always know if this is done without their direct permission.

Recommended: Personally, I think Plastic Lock Tags are the perfect solution for beginners and short-term chastity play: they are lightweight, unbreakable, easily removable in an emergency, and numbered, so you’ll always know if they’ve been removed—it’s unlikely the sub will be able to find another. Better than padlocks, which can be picked or there might be ‘other keys’ in play!

Keyholder Solutions

3. Key Safes
A key safe with a combination code is a great option for emergency access. Share the code with a trusted partner or store it securely. (You can also use ones with timers to great effect as part of chastity games. Back in the day I would post keys back to subs, they would have to wait patiently by the post box for their release to arrive. What could go wrong!)

4. Digital Devices
Some modern chastity devices integrate with apps, allowing remote locking/unlocking. These are ideal for long-distance relationships but require a reliable device, internet and battery management!

5. Safety Protocols
♦   Agree on a safe word or signal for immediate removal, no questions asked.
♦   Check in regularly with your keyholder to discuss comfort and emotional well-being.
♦   If swelling, pain, or injury occurs, remove the device immediately and seek medical advice if needed.

Additional Tips for Beginners

♦   Hygiene is Critical: Clean the device and your skin daily. Remove the device for thorough cleaning every few days, long term uses will need a more regular cleaning plan/schedule.

♦   Start with Open Designs: Devices with open tips or ventilation holes are easier for beginners to manage.

♦   Experiment with Activities: Test the device during different activities (sitting, walking, exercising) to ensure it’s practical for your lifestyle.

♦   Mental Preparation: Chastity can evoke strong emotions, from excitement to frustration. Be patient with yourself and communicate openly with your partner.

♦   Community Support: Online forums or communities (like those on Reddit or FetLife) offer tips and support from experienced users. Always verify advice with trusted sources.

Common Challenges and Solutions

♦   Erection Discomfort: Morning erections are normal. Relax, breathe deeply, or take a cold shower to reduce arousal. Devices with slight give (like silicone) can help.

♦   Chafing: Apply a thin layer of lubricant. Switch to a larger ring if irritation persists.

♦   Difficulty Urinating: Align the device properly and sit during urination to minimise mess. Open-tip devices are easier for this.

♦   Emotional Struggles: Feeling restricted can be intense. Set clear time limits and check in with yourself or your partner regularly.

Wearing a chastity device can be a rewarding journey, whether you’re exploring personal boundaries, deepening intimacy with a partner, or submitting to the control of a dominant partner. Start with a well-fitted, comfortable device, build up wear time gradually, and prioritise hygiene and safety. Accessories like lubricants, stockings, and locking tags can make the experience smoother, while open communication with your keyholder ensures trust and enjoyment. Listen to your body, take breaks when needed, and approach chastity with curiosity and care. With patience and practice, chastity can become a fulfilling part of your sexual journey. Enjoy the exploration, and play safe!

Read Part 1: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 2: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 3: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play

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A Beginner’s Guide to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt2

A Beginner’s Guide
to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt2
Or everything you ever wanted to know about male chastity cages

Extreme & Advanced Devices & Styles
Extreme chastity devices, such as tiny “micro” cages, those with sharp pegs or teeth, and designs incorporating sounds, are specialised options intended for advanced users seeking intense restriction, discomfort, or control. These devices push boundaries beyond standard chastity, often blending physical restraint with elements of pain or extreme submission.

These devices are only for very experienced Advanced users, those comfortable with urethral play, extreme BDSM players or consensual dynamics involving pain &  punishment.

♦   Micro Chastity Devices
These are ultra-small, tiny cages, often called “nub” or “micro” devices, designed to compress the penis to an extremely confined size, sometimes less than an half an inch in length. The cage tightly encases the flaccid penis, preventing any expansion or erection. The extreme confinement can cause discomfort, especially during attempted erections, amplifying the sense of restriction and control. Hygiene requires diligence due to limited airflow.

♦   Chastity Devices with Sharp Pegs or Teeth
These often metal cages feature internal spikes, pegs, or “teeth” (blunt or sharp metal points) that press against the penis, particularly during arousal or attempted erections. Designs vary, but quality designs allow for the depth of these pegs to be adjusted using a hex key. The “teeth” may line the interior of the cage or focus on specific areas, like the shaft or tip. When flaccid, the pegs may be barely noticeable, but any erection causes the skin to press against the spikes, delivering discomfort or mild pain as a deterrent against arousal, heightens discipline, and appeals to those into pain play. 

Extreme & Advanced Devices & Styles

♦    Chastity Devices with Sounds
These incorporate a urethral sound, a thin, smooth rod (usually metal or silicone) inserted into the urethra, attached to or integrated with the cage. The sound may be fixed or removable, often locking the cage in place. Some use metal for rigidity, with a hollow or solid sound (4-8 mm in diameter, varying lengths). Some designs align the sound with a cage tip for stability and deeper control. The sound restricts urethral access, prevents full erections, and creates a unique, invasive sensation, ranging from mild pressure to discomfort, especially during movement or arousal. Lubrication and sterilisation are critical. They provide intense control, unique psychological and physical sensation, and high security. Howver carry the risk of urinary tract infections, discomfort, or injury if not properly sized, cleaned, or lubricated; they are not suitable for prolonged wear without breaks. Always research reputable manufacturers for quality and reliability.

   Testicle/Ball Cages
Chastity cages also exist for male testicles, these devices are designed to encase and restrict access to the testicles, in order to limit sexual access or for ultimate control. (These ball cages can be highly effective for men with erotically sensitive testicles – preventing all-round pleasure denial.) They typically consist of a ring and round cage structure, usually metal, are often weighted for added sensation and can have internal teeth.

Important Considerations/ Risks
Extreme devices carry risks, are only for experienced users they must fit properly, need hygiene management. Research reputable manufacturers and consult a kink-aware professional if unsure.

Starting Out: How Long to Wear a Chastity Device

Wearing a chastity device is a gradual process. Rushing into long-term wear can lead to discomfort or problems. Here’s how to build up wear time safely:

♦  First Things First: Prior to putting on a chastity device consider abstaining for a few days or even a week to get accustomed to the feelings. It might feel exciting to start your first denial period in a chastity device, the reality is that the combination of coping with the device and managing your desire to orgasm can be challenging if you’re not prepared.

1. Initial Wear

♦   Start Small: Begin with short sessions of 1–2 hours while awake to get accustomed to the sensation. Wear the device during low-activity periods, like watching TV or reading.

♦   Check for Comfort: After each session, inspect your skin for redness, chafing, or numbness. Mild redness is normal, but persistent pain or discolouration means the device is too tight or needs adjustment.

2. Gradual Build-Up

♦   Daily Wear: Once comfortable, extend wear time to 4–6 hours daily over a week. Experiment with light activities like walking or sitting.

♦   Overnight Wear: After a week of successful daytime wear, try wearing the device overnight for one night. Ensure you’re in a safe environment with access to the key in case of discomfort.

♦   Extended Periods: Gradually increase to 24–48 hours, then up to a week, always listening to your body. Most beginners take 2–4 weeks to comfortably wear a device for extended periods.

3. Listen to Your Body

Your body will signal if something’s wrong. Watch for:
♦    Pain or Numbness: Indicates a device that’s too tight or improperly fitted.
♦   Chafing or Irritation: May require lubrication, a different material or a better quality device.
♦    Swelling or Discolouration: Stop wearing immediately!
♦   Hygiene Issues: Sweat or poor cleaning can lead to infections. Clean the device and your skin daily with mild soap and water. This is often the number one issue with chastity devices they (unfortunately) need to be regularly removed and cleaned fully.) Those wearing chastity for long periods, anything over 24hrs especially 24/7 must work in a daily cleaning ritual.
♦   Take breaks if you experience discomfort. It’s normal to need time to adjust.

4. Basics, Accessories and Tools for Comfort

♦   Basics: Put on your chastity device while you are flaccid!!! With base rings learn to push each ball separately through the base ring, if it a fixed size.

♦    Cotton Buds: Cotton buds (Q-tips) can help guide the penis into the cage, especially for smaller or curved devices. Use it to gently adjust positioning without forcing the skin. Or to push the skin down to prevent pinching when closing the ring/device. 

♦   LubricantsUse water-based lubricants to ease the device onto the skin and reduce friction. Avoid silicone-based lubes with silicone devices, as they can degrade the material. Apply a small amount to the base ring and cage interior before putting it on.

♦   Waist Belts: Belts provide additional support and security especially for heavier devices. 

The Stocking Method
Help For Putting on Difficult cages 

♦   For male devices, putting on a tight cage can be challenging. Use a thin, clean stocking (like a nylon or pantyhose), cut off below the knee:

1. Pull the cut stocking over the penis.
2. Slide the cage over the stocking, guiding the penis into place.
3. Gently pull the stocking out, leaving the penis inside the cage.

This method reduces pinching and makes application smoother obviously doesn’t work with more extreme or covering devices. 

Read Part 1: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 2: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 3: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play

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A Beginner’s Guide to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt1

A Beginner’s Guide
to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt1

Or everything you ever wanted to know about male chastity cages

Male Chastity devices have become increasingly popular in the world of kink in the last decade, especially with the advance of so many different and reasonably priced options.
So whether you’re drawn to chastity for personal exploration, to enhance intimacy, or as part of a consensual D/s or FLR dynamic this guide will walk you through the essentials of choosing, wearing, and maintaining a chastity device safely and comfortably. Written (mainly) for beginners, this article hopefully covers everything!

What is Chastity Play?

Chastity play is a consensual practice where one partner is kept in a chaste state, prevented from touching, masturbating, or achieving orgasm except at the discretion of their ‘keyholder’. This is typically achieved using a chastity device, a wearable item made of materials like plastic, silicone, or stainless steel, designed to restrict access to the genitals and prevent sexual activity or stimulation, which is locked in place and cannot be removed. The duration of chastity can vary, ranging from a few hours or days to a long-term lifestyle choice where the state is maintained for extended periods.

Intimacy & Surrender
♦   It can enhance intimacy by deepening trust through a dynamic of control and surrender, often within a D/s (Dominant/submissive) or FLR (Female Led Relationship) framework where the Keyholder controls access to the device and decides when and if it may be removed. The chastity device may also act as a sign of the wearers ‘owned’ status. This may be through a RL or on-line relationship.

Focus
♦   It can redirect the wearer’s focus toward providing sexual pleasure or service to their partner rather than receiving it, or act as a broader tool for exerting control. It stops habitual wanking and its draining effect on the libido.

Teasing Games
♦   Used for short periods as a tool for orgasm control and teasing games, keeping thosed locked in a heightened state of arousal while denying release, leaving them desperate, pliable, and attentive. This controls their sexual desires, prevents erections, and allows you to use their arousal to your advantage, with orgasms granted only at your whim.

Self-Discipline
♦   Some individuals pursue chastity for personal exploration, using it for self-discipline, sacrifice, or to control/explore their desires and focus. 

Feminisation
♦  Feminisation, this can involve using a device to restrict genital access, aiming to control inherent male urges and redirect focus from these sexual impulses. This practice allows the wearer to explore a feminine identity or expression while also physically minimising the visible shape of the penis.

Before engaging in chastity play with a partner, it’s crucial to discuss boundaries, expectations, and safe words to ensure clear communication, consent, and a shared understanding of the play.

Choosing the Right Chastity Device

Selecting the right chastity device is crucial for comfort, safety, and enjoyment. Here’s what to consider:

Materials: Resin, Silicone, Stainless Steel & Plastic

1. Material

Chastity devices come in various materials, each with pros and cons:
♦   Plastic: Lightweight, affordable, and good for beginners. Breathable but less durable.
♦   Silicone: Flexible and comfortable for long-term wear but may not feel as secure.
♦   Stainless Steel: Durable, secure, and hygienic but heavier and more expensive.
♦   Resin: Lightweight and customisable but may require more maintenance.

For beginners, plastic or silicone devices are often recommended due to their flexibility and lower cost.

2. Styles

Closed Devices
Fully enclosed tubes or cages that cover the entire penis, often with small openings for urination and ventilation.
♦   Pros: High security, minimal stimulation, and effective at preventing erections or touch.
♦   Cons: Can be harder to clean, may trap moisture, and might feel more restrictive.
♦   Best For: Long-term wear, strict denial, or those seeking maximum control.

Open or Bar Cage Devices
Feature bars or open sections, leaving parts of the penis exposed while still restricting full erections and access.
♦   Pros: Better airflow, easier to clean, and often more comfortable for extended wear.
♦   Cons: Less secure against stimulation or touch, as some skin remains accessible.
♦   Best For: Beginners, longer wear, or those prioritising hygiene and comfort.

Belt-Style Extreme Devices
A full chastity system with a waistband or harness that secures a cage or shield over the genitals, often locking at the waist.
♦   Pros: Extremely secure, prevents removal, and can cover more of the pelvic area.
♦   Cons: Bulkier, less discreet, and can be uncomfortable for sitting or active lifestyles.
♦   Best For: High security needs, long-term use, or those under strict partner control.

Custom
Tailor-made to fit your exact measurements, often using materials like 3D-printed resin, or metal, with customizable cage and ring designs. For feminisation they offer a variety of female shape designs.
♦   Pros: Perfect fit, enhanced comfort, and options for open or closed styles.
♦  Cons: Expensive, longer wait times for production, and may require adjustments.
♦   Best For: Experienced users, long-term wear, or those with unique sizing needs.

Styles: Open/Cage, Closed, Hybrid, Belts, Custom

Hybrid Devices
Combine elements of open and closed designs, such as a partially enclosed tip with open sides or slots for ventilation.
♦   Pros: Balances security and hygiene, offering moderate restriction and comfort.
♦   Cons: May not be as secure as full cages or as breathable as open designs.
♦   Best For: Versatile use, those unsure of their preference, or moderate-term wear.
(See also: Extreme & Advanced Devices & Styles in Pt2 of this article)

3. Size and Fit
A properly sized device is essential for comfort and safety. A poorly fitted device can cause chafing, pinching, or restricted blood flow. Here’s how to choose:

♦   Measure Accurately: Measure the penis length from the base to the tip and the circumference at the widest point while flaccid. Most manufacturers provide sizing guides.
♦   Cage Size: For male chastity devices, the cage should be slightly longer than the flaccid penis length to prevent erections but not so tight as to cause discomfort. A gap of about 1/4 of an inch between the tip and the cage is ideal.
♦   Base Ring Size: The ring that sits around the scrotum should be snug but not constricting. Test by ensuring you can fit one finger between the ring and your skin.
♦   Adjustability Some devices come with adjustable rings or spacers, which are great for beginners still finding their fit.

4. Comfort Features

Look for devices with:
♦   Ventilation holes to reduce sweat and improve hygiene.
♦   
Smooth edges to prevent chafing. (Some 3D-printed chastity devices may have rough, sharp edges due to poor quality, these imperfections can often be smoothed out by sanding.)
♦   Lightweight designs to allow for day-to-day life.

♦   A design that allows for easy urination.
♦ Consider using a ‘Numbered Plastic Lock Tag’ rather than a traditional padlock & key. See Pt3 of this article.

You may need to try a few devices to find the optimal cage, as comfort and the requirements needed from a device varies from person to person. 

Read Part 1: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 2: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 3: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play

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Outrageously Out-There Kinky T-Shirts

It’s Literally Raining Men: T-shirt by the wonderful Jim’ll Paint It

Outrageously Out-There Kinky T-Shirts

It’s the holiday season so let’s dip into some seriously daring fun! We’ve curated a selection of cheeky, rude, risqué, and totally out-there t-shirts and caps that are guaranteed to turn heads. These femdom, fetish & kinky designs aren’t for the Vanilla world – whether you’re strutting your stuff or proudly flaunting your wild side, kudos to you for owning it! Highlights include a striking repeating design featuring Mansion Domina Mistress Inka’s fierce face; and our own fabulous T-Girl Mellisa Taylor “Don’t Bully Me I’ll Cum”.

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Top Dom: Lady Sara Borgia


The English Mansion always invites the world’s top dominas to come over, stay and play! We thought we should salute the very best of them and show you some of their finest moments. So here’s the provocative Lady Sara Borgia.

Top Dom: Lady Sara Borgia

Lady Sara Borgia is a stunningly beautiful, experienced dominatrix and femdom content producer. She oozes a rather sultry, seductive mien, the air around her crackels with her electric  allure.  A ruler of men – she is naturally commanding and exceptionally capable. This lady will easily captivate you with her arresting looks and shapley feminine physique. A divine mix of elegant lady and strict sexy siren, that will bring any sub to their knees, and Her heel.

Femdom Party Planner
Lady Borgia loves femdom parties: Strap on Parties, Sissy Parties, Prison Parties and Anything Goes Parties. She organises these regularly at her play-space or The Pain Palace in Worcester, UK.
As an established prodom she has her own chambers in Central Birmingham, the Midlands, UK. She brings her extensive BDSM knowledge, intelligence and intuition to those in her charge and specialises in: Xdressing & sissy training; anal & strapon play; and offers a unique one to one prison experience at The UK Penitentiary.
(Photo above left: Lady Sara getting ready to party with Mistress Ava Von Medisin & Mistress Vixen)

Sara is also an accomplished femdom content producer, with a treasury of amazing films & clips: she has her own Members’ site; is available on femdom clips stores; or you can devote yourself via her Fan Sites.

We highly recommend you check out all of Lady Sara Borgia’s links  HERE

So here’s just a very small taste of the gorgeous Lady Sara Borgia in action inside The English Mansion…

Lady Sara Borgia

~~~~~~~~~~ ♠ ~~~~~~~~~~

See also other ~  English Mansion Top Doms
click on images below to open

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10 Reasons Why You Should Pay For Your Kink

You’ve drooled over the super *hot* stars, tried to follow the weak plots, learned the skill of one-handed typing – You’ve got the T-Shirt and loved every moment… Now pay for it!

Don’t panic I’m not here to berate anyone, I do that enough to my subs 🙂  If you’re reading this you’ve probably been or are a member of The Mansion so I’m speaking to the converted. There is a serious issue though – free torrent and tube sites (there are some big names in here), have decimated the adult industry. Denying hard working individuals the true recompense for their work, with the added complication that they have little means to address the theft of their work. So here are 10 reason why you should pay for your kink:

10 Reasons Why
You Should Pay For Your Kink

1.  Free Porn is Rubbish
Yes there are literally thousands of free sex torrent and tube sites but the content is old, not great quality or it’s just trailers. This is why all those sites look the same. You can’t properly search or find what you are looking for and the servers can be slow. Plus you have to do battle with endless pop-ups and other web junk assaulting you from all sides of the screen.

2.  Quality Content & Real Engagement Lives Behind a Pay Wall
Members, clips & fan sites offer new & exclusive, high-quality content based on what their members want to see, it’s updated, at least weekly, often daily. They offer fast local servers allowing you to download or stream in fast time, have excellent customer support, offer HD & 4K resolution, high-quality photographs and even 3D interactive virtual reality experiences. Then there is the genuine fan interactions with performers, yes engagement with the real person!  Live webcam shows, custom content, on-line training/activities. Large sites have comprehensive ways for you to search the hours of content they have on offer. (Inside the Mansion you can search by: domme, areas, tags, cloud, categories and keywords. You can see what’s new since your last visit & create a page of your favourite content.)

3.  No Junk & No Risk
By paying to enter a site or follow a particular domme, e.g. on Only Fans, you will immediately avoid the endless stream of pop-up advertisements (hot babes near you who are looking for men!) and urgent flash player updates that you should definitely not download! You will dodge the possibility of viruses, malware & endless clickbait adverts. Plus by using reputable sites you’re not giving anyone access to your passwords and other personal data.

4.  Support Women Creators & A New Era of Truly Consensual Content
You are supporting consensual content that the creator had total control over producing. The approach and business model of the adult industry has completely changed since the advent of the internet. It is no longer the bastion of men who in the past often produced offensive, brutal, misogynistic and criminal content. Women are no longer marginalised or exploited they are taking control, running their own businesses and it’s changing the face of adult entertainment.

5.  You’re a Good Person
I know there’s probably no one reading this who hasn’t watched free porn on the web but remember mostly it’s not free! It’s stolen material. I understand it’s not like stealing from a shop, it’s like walking into a shop and there is no shopkeeper and a sign that says “please take the sweeties”. These sites have done a good job at convincing you that it’s OK to watch purloined content because they make it so easy to access. While watching it on your PC makes you feel hidden from your actions. You’d never walk into a cinema, watch a new blockbuster and not pay. The problem is it’s not a sustainable business model. Without the people who pay for porn, people won’t make porn. When you pay for content you are supporting the creators, the actual people who made it, who in turn can invest back into their businesses and continue to make quality content.

6. Help Balance out the Inherent Marginalization
Creators of adult content are already marginalized by the work they do (kink providers even more so), making it much harder for them to enforce copyright. They run legitimate companies, pay tax and are expected to operate their business like any other but don’t get the support or protection they deserve. Being properly recompensed for their work is empowering for them and a basic human right. They in turn can invest back in their businesses equalling higher quality content for their subscribers.

Even though porn is getting more mainstream recognition, it still isn’t perceived as a legitimate industry. In turn making creators somewhat lesser human beings whose worth and value is not respected. This acts to validate the normality of watching looted content. In turn delegitimizing the industry. It’s a vicious cycle that needs to be broken.

7.  Support Sex Workers & End the Cycle Of Shame
It reduces the stigma and slut shaming associated with sex work and the collective societal embarrassment of watching adult content. It’s perfectly natural to want to view consensual/moderate/safe adult images. If you steal content: you continue the delegitimization of the industry; compound the mindset that watching porn is sleazy and shameful; and disrespect the work and value of creators.

8.  It’s Not Expensive
Paying to view kinky porn is not expensive. Even the highest priced members’ or fan sites are less than £6/$7 a week – that’s about the cost of one bottle of pub/bar beer.

9.  It’s Private & Discreet
Nearly every site processes credit card transactions through an intermediary or innocuously named vendor account.

10. It Protects The Young (& Those that don’t want it Popping up Everywhere)
We all agree children and young people should not have access to adult material – but kids are not paying for it from reputable providers!!! They access it because it is so ubiquitous and freely available. By supporting free sites this enables an unacceptable free open-access policy. Paying for porn keeps it behind paywall – this is what actual content producers want!!!
(Reputable producers keep age verification proof on file, take consent videos from all their performers and embed their sites with parental filtering software.)

Please support The English Mansion a female run & owned business! And all the amazing female Dommes who work with us. So, if you have ever watched a domme on a free tube or torrent site, atone now by going and joining her fan page/buying clips to support her!
See here for all our dommes links

See here for my introduction to this blog:
Seedy, Shameful & Criminal: A History of Buying Porn

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